I think that I have stopped kidding myself that I'm an artist. I may have had a few noteworthy works in my high school days, but not anymore. I try too hard, therefore the results are crap. And sometimes I wait for inspiration to come, and it never arrives.
Mid-term has come and gone. My grades were satisfactory. I guess the hours upon hours of homework and stress paid off. My reward to myself, since there was no interest in celebration, was a couple of hard ciders and a movie at home.
You would think that when your grandmother tells you how proud she is of you for the profession you're training for, you would feel good about yourself. Instead, pessimistic me, I only feel the dread of failure and disappointment when I do something to screw it up. The more pride people have in you, the greater their disappointment.
My Halloween costume sits beside my bed in a heap. I had been looking forward to getting ahold of that particular costume for some time, and now that I have it, I can't help but wonder if I'll have a reason to wear it.
Mid-term has come and gone. My grades were satisfactory. I guess the hours upon hours of homework and stress paid off. My reward to myself, since there was no interest in celebration, was a couple of hard ciders and a movie at home.
You would think that when your grandmother tells you how proud she is of you for the profession you're training for, you would feel good about yourself. Instead, pessimistic me, I only feel the dread of failure and disappointment when I do something to screw it up. The more pride people have in you, the greater their disappointment.
My Halloween costume sits beside my bed in a heap. I had been looking forward to getting ahold of that particular costume for some time, and now that I have it, I can't help but wonder if I'll have a reason to wear it.
No comments:
Post a Comment